If you have followed me for years, then you know I’m not a fan of Valentine’s Day. I have ranted about the commercialism, the price-gouging, the obligation, the relationship requirement, the high expectations, and the overall pre-packaged nature of it all which leaves me with a bit of a resistant and maybe even resentful mindset for this day of love and the saccharine rituals associated with it.

I am going to head in a slightly different direction today, all the while keeping love in my vision. I think we actually do a rather good job of loving others, but who I think we fail to love successfully and wholeheartedly is ourselves. Most of us put ourselves last, as we focus on those around us, and that is extremely unhealthy, and will lead to the ultimate breakdown of us in one way or another. It’s like driving a car, if you never fill it with gas, eventually, it will stop working.

So, maybe we should consider making ourselves the Valentine? Not just today, but regularly. How do you show love to yourself? How do you care for yourself like you care for your loved ones? Why do you always put yourself last? Why do you think “selfless” is something to be proud of? Selfless teaches everyone around you that you deserve to be last. That’s not O.K. Please add yourself to the list of Valentines today. Not loving ourselves is NOT O.K. Let’s GO! WE GOT THIS!

Beth Fitzgerald

P.S. The best self-love gift you can give yourself is time—what will you do for yourself with the time you have allotted just for you?